I Do Not Want to Get a Divorce. What Can I Do? 

 Posted on April 29, 2025 in Illinois Divorce

It can be heartbreaking to learn that your spouse has decided to file for divorce when you do not want the marriage to end. You may feel shocked, confused, or desperate to fix things. While Illinois law does not allow one spouse to legally block a divorce, that does not mean you are powerless.

If you want to save your marriage, there may be steps you can take to encourage your spouse to rethink their decision. Ultimately, however, divorce is a unilateral legal process, meaning one spouse can decide on their own to get a divorce and the court will see the process through. 

It may be tempting to not cooperate at all with a spouse who is filing for divorce if you do not want to get divorced. Unfortunately, not cooperating may end up being the worst thing you can do, especially if your spouse is certain to end the marriage. Whatever your circumstances may be, a Kane County family law attorney can help you understand your rights and prepare for whatever comes next.

Can You Stop a Divorce From Moving Forward?

In Illinois, one spouse can file for divorce based on "irreconcilable differences." The law does not require both spouses to agree. Once a divorce petition is filed and served by one spouse, the case can proceed whether or not the other spouse wants it.

However, there is often time between the decision to file and the final decree. During this period, some couples work through their differences and reconcile — especially if one partner is willing to take responsibility and try to improve the relationship. While this is not guaranteed to change the outcome, it can be a meaningful step.

What Can You Do if You Want to Rebuild the Marriage Instead of Getting Divorced?

If your goal is to preserve the relationship, consider the following:

• Express your desire to work things out respectfully, without pressuring your spouse

• Suggest counseling or therapy, either together or individually

• Make lifestyle changes that address your spouse’s concerns if they have been shared

• Give your spouse space to think while also demonstrating your willingness to change

• Avoid arguing over the divorce itself, which may harden your spouse’s decision

Even if your spouse does not respond right away, showing that you are open to growth and reconciliation may keep the door open longer.

What If Your Spouse Refuses to Consider Fixing Your Marriage?

Unfortunately, if your spouse is committed to the divorce, there is little you can do to stop it. In that case, your focus should shift to protecting your financial future, your relationship with your children, and your emotional health during the process.

A divorce attorney can help you understand your rights and responsibilities as the process moves forward. If you are concerned about preserving your financial security or want to protect your relationship with your children, having legal guidance is essential. Your lawyer can review any proposed terms, represent you in negotiations or hearings, and make sure the final settlement reflects your contributions to the marriage and your needs moving forward.

Contact a Kane County, IL Divorce Lawyer

If you are facing an unwanted divorce, speak with a St. Charles, IL family law attorney at Weiler & Associates, Inc. by calling 630-331-9110. We can help you evaluate your options and prepare for the next steps — whether reconciliation is possible or not.